I’ve just come back from a woman’s moon circle. And this time, there was just something so grounding and heart opening about it. It has been a while since I have been to this little gathering, I’d been putting off previous circles because of silly little things like the weather, the tide and because I just plain didn’t feel like it. But tonight, oh tonight there was just something willing for me to go. It was only a small group, and these women I hardly know but I felt held and connected.
Holding space for each other under this Taurus full moon, with a total eclipse and a blood moon was just next level. I could feel this shift amongst us all, this epic levelling up in awareness and consciousness. And it is not for just us, it was for all our sisters. To raise our vibration collectively.
In the past I have been fearful of committing and growing female friendships. They can be complex, but the more I unpack my ancestral conditioning, the more I realise it doesn’t have to be.
I realise that somewhere in my ancestral line, directly with my mother, my aunties, her mother and from what I remember of my great-grandmother, there has been restriction. An inner conflict that they have never been allowed to express. A suppression of their divine gifts to nurture.
It is like they got to a certain threshold and this unknown presence, said no, that’s enough. This is your limit.
I’ve carried this around with me for such a large portion of my life.
It is only now, as I work through these childhood and ancestral traumas seeking the dis-ease within myself and my maternal relationships that I begin to recognise the pattern in the disharmony. We’ve been held by limiting beliefs that we were not worthy to step fully into our purpose. To step fully into our light.
I remember as a child, asking my mum what her passions were. She loved to create, she even studied at art school. But then she had children and the stigma for her, was that dream was to be put on hold and family life came first. Her societal conditioning repressed her from expressing her true self.
I am thankful though, that she encouraged these creative traits in all of us as we grew up, and anyone who truly knows me would agree that I hold a creative flair.
As I got older, I carried around this repression. A disconnection from myself and from deeply connecting with other girls. I believe this was the cellular translation of trauma that my mother experienced, complied on top of her own emotional trauma passed on from her mother.
For a large portion of my life, my closet friends have been male. They were the people I confided in because I didn’t feel the same level of judgement as I did from confiding in females. My husband is still my truest confidant, but as my awareness and healing grows, I see the need to re-establish this connection with my sacred feminine. To re-discover my ancient womb wisdom.
I am so thankful for the experiences in life that have led me to where I am today. I would not be the evolution of who I am without it. My feet wouldn’t have found the path of ancestral healing that my soul so craves.
So, under this blood moon tonight, I let go of old patterns. I allowed myself to accept that it is okay to walk my own path, to find warmth and comfort and connection to my sisters. Knowing that they are walking right beside me. To break the bonds of mine and their ancestral linage, to allow the ones gone before us the opportunity to heal themselves, even if it is in spirit.
If your heart has been asking questions, now is the time to start searching for the answers.
This is a new and a profound sense of spiritual release for me, and I’m looking forward to what synchronicities will present themselves in these shifting times.
If you feel like any of this has been resonating with you, let me know. I would love to hear your experiences with this cosmic shift.
Loving you with the purest of intentions,
Sharai Cover image from @emvielle
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